There are roughly thirty-nine days until we leave for Ecuador. Thirty-nine! This is simultaneously enthralling as well as terrifying. It still doesn’t feel real.
Alas, I must move past the point of denial and accept it. I chose Lewis & Clark for many reasons, but the overseas program was a definite factor. In my senior year of high school, all I could dream about was traveling and seeing the world. Studying abroad has been romanticized in my mind for so long, I keep waiting for something to happen and hold me back from going. I guess I like to expect the worse so that way when and if I get to Ecuador, it will feel that much more exciting and amazing. Granted, it’s probably not the healthiest mindset for me to have, but hey, it’s been working for me so far.
The closer the date arrives, the more nervous I get. But when I think about what I am actually nervous for, I can’t really pin it down. Yes, I am nervous about using my Spanish and not being able to communicate. Yes, I am nervous about living with strangers for the whole semester. But these things I can quickly calm myself down about, and I feel prepared with various strategies and mindsets to help me transition. Honestly, I think what I am most nervous about is the fact that I am nervous to begin with. I am scared about missing out on opportunities, I am nervous about missing out on people and great conversations and adventures. I am afraid that I’ll get stuck in my room and never want to leave. I must highlight that these are all very new thoughts for me. I love travel, meeting people and exploring. So what is so different about this time? I would like to attribute these thoughts to the overwhelming wave of finals headed straight for us. I know I am also getting sad at the thought of leaving my friends and being separated from them for so long. I feel anxious about figuring out where to work and live this summer, and I am worried that these anxieties will consume me while I am in Ecuador.
But with these fears and worries, must come some proactive strategies to ensure I don’t spend my time abroad moping about inside. Apart from my nervousness, I cannot highlight just how excited I am to be going to Ecuador!! I am beyond stoked for the opportunity to spend a week in the Amazon, and I am really looking forward to seeing how my Spanish progresses in my time there. I can’t wait to meet and make friends and see what adventures lay in store. When I think about Ecuador, I think about all of the amazing experiences I will have and remember forever. Let’s do this!